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PSYART  March 2006, Week 3

PSYART March 2006, Week 3

Subject:

Fw: the terrors of aliveness

From:

"Murray M. Schwartz" <[log in to unmask]>

Reply-To:

Murray M. Schwartz

Date:

Wed, 15 Mar 2006 07:02:13 -0500

Content-Type:

text/plain

Parts/Attachments:

Parts/Attachments

text/plain (83 lines)

From: "k2f2" <[log in to unmask]>
Subject: Re: the terrors of aliveness


> Nice selection, nice question.
> 
> I think of the terror of unrestrained response to unlimited options  
> and stimuli.  There is the pure encounter with ones own libido - in  
> the sexual sense, narrowly, and in the sense of hungers reaching out  
> to infinite goodies.  There will always be some kind of boundary,  
> some limits, some more arbitrary, some indulgent and enabling, some  
> more or less facilitative of turning the unattenuated receptivity and  
> propulsion of what some people call "id" into real satisfactions,  
> real nourishment.  Monogamy offers a controversial solution - to say  
> that I choose one mate and one only, whether serially or for the rest  
> of my days.  It cures the terror because, with some manageable margin  
> of error, we can look at one another and know that the infinite set  
> of goodies to be pursued, and there dangers, has been tamed - there  
> is shelter, and options, and teamwork, and a deep-down sense of  
> aaaaah, oooook.  It is not just that we don't have to worry about the  
> agonies of dating, STD's, a sense of "who will truly love me?",who  
> else is she sleeping with, etc,  in the conventional sense; it means  
> that unfettered aliveness is fettered by partnership, and aliveness  
> is now compatible with life - good for living, lets us concentrate  
> and sleep well, live well.  The soul has a strong base, a good  
> resting place, a trusted source of pleasure - in some sense, serves  
> the adult need in the ways something maternal addresses the basic  
> terror of being awake outside the womb.
> 
> Romantic though it may be - and I am sitting in Starbucks as i write,  
> watching the girls go by - being monogamous lets me appreciate how I  
> have more access to "women", to the beauties of women, via this one  
> woman, than i could have through the "freedom" to couple and decouple  
> with all possible women.  The least diluted, most satisfying way to  
> love, for me, and as far as I can tell, for her.  We are still  
> "alive", and subject to all sorts of things - and with no illusions  
> that this "cure" of monogamy grants us immunity from the vicissitudes  
> of "aliveness", but the best possible buffer.
> 
> Love - the best possible buffer.  hows that for a lousy bumper  
> sticker, and a blight on centuries of romantic poetry?
> 
> Dan Sapen
> [log in to unmask]
> [log in to unmask]
> 
> 
> 
> On Mar 12, 2006, at 5:18 AM, Murray Schwartz wrote:
> 
>>
>>
>> 
>> From: [log in to unmask] [mailto:[log in to unmask]]
>> Subject: the terrors of aliveness
>> 
>> 
>> 
>> Adam Phillips wrote:
>>    To be honest I am not thrilled with Stephen Mitchell for  
>> various significant philosophical reasons. But I am interested in  
>> this quote from Adam Phillips:  "Monogamy cures the terror of  
>> aliveness."
>>     Can anyone comment, impressions, feelings, opinions--no  
>> outside sources--I'm interested in what you think.
>> 
>> Bobby Rodgers
>> 
>> 
>> 
>>
>> 
>> 
>> 
>> 
>>
>> 
>> 
>> 
>>
>> 
> 
>

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December 1998, Week 5
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December 1997, Week 5
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