Adapted from Al Pacino's speech in the movie "Any Given Sunday."
I don't know what to say really.
4 days to the biggest final of our graduate student lives
all comes down to these evaluations.
Either we finish them as a class
or we are going to crumble.
Inch by inch, play by play
till we're finished.
We are in hell right now, ladies and gentlemen
and we can stay here
and not get our free bonus points
we can fight our way
back into the light.
We can climb out of hell.
One course evaluation, at a time.
Now I can't do it for you.
I've already done mine.
You know when you get old in life
things get taken from you.
That's, that's part of life.
But, you only learn that when you start losing stuff.
You find out that life is just a game of variance.
So is statistics.
Because in either game
life or statistics
the margin for standard error is so small.
one degree of freedom too small or too big
you don't quite make it.
One uncorrelated residual, or unweighted indicator regression
and you don't quite fit the model.
The free points we need are right in front of us.
They are in these two unfinished course evaluations.
In this class, we fight for those points
In this class, we tear ourselves, and everyone around us
to pieces for those free points.
We CLAW with our finger nails for those free points.
Cause we know
when we add up all those free points
that's going to make the f***ing difference
between GETTING AN "A" and GETTING A "B"
between LIVING and DYING.
I'll tell you this
in any fight
it is the guy who is willing to die
who is going to fill out that course evaluation.
And I know
if I am going to have any life anymore
it is because, I am still willing to fight, and die for those free points
because that is what LIVING is.
The two free points right in front of your face.
Now I can't make you do it.
You gotta look at the guy next to you.
Look into his eyes.
Now I think you are going to see a guy who will fill out that evaluation.
You are going to see a guy
who will sacrifice himself for this class
because he knows when it comes down to it,
you are gonna do the same thing for him.
That's a statistics class, ladies and gentlemen
and either we fill these evaluations out now, as a class,
or we will fail, as individual students.
That's multivariate, guys.
That's all it is.
Now, what are you gonna do?
Breton Michael Asken, ATC
Department of Clinical and Health Psychology, Neuropsychology
College of Public Health and Health Professions
From: Applied Multivariate Methods in Psychology [[log in to unmask]] on behalf of Michael Marsiske [[log in to unmask]]
Sent: Friday, December 12, 2014 7:34 AM
To: [log in to unmask]
Subject: LAST DAY...two left
35/37 students have completed student evaluations of teaching. This means you qualify for one bonus point.
If the remaining two rate at https://evaluations.ufl.edu before midnight, you can still qualify for a second bonus point. Finishers, please encourage your colleagues!
Department of Clinical and Health Psychology
University of Florida
PO Box 100165
1225 Center Dr, Room 3150
Gainesville, FL 32610-0165
Phone: (352) 273-5097
Fax: (801) 720-5897
Email: [log in to unmask]