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PSYART  April 1999, Week 5

PSYART April 1999, Week 5

Subject:

Grammesis

From:

Norman Holland <[log in to unmask]>

Reply-To:

Institute for Psychological Study of the Arts <[log in to unmask]>

Date:

Thu, 29 Apr 1999 16:52:58 -0400

Content-Type:

text/plain

Parts/Attachments:

Parts/Attachments

text/plain (82 lines)

>>
>>1.  In the beginning my English teacher created nouns and verbs.
>>2.  And the verbs were without form and voice; and darkness was
>>     upon the face of the deep--my teacher.
>>3.  And she said, "Let there be grammar;" and there was grammar.
>>4.  And Teacher saw the verbs and laughed and said that it was good;
>>     and she divided the bright students from those who remained in
>>     darkness.
>>5. And Teacher gave the bright students A's and kept the others after
>>     school. And the homework and the bell were the first day.
>>6. And Teacher said, "Let there be a sentence in the midst of the
>>     words, and let it divide the nouns from the verbs.
>>7. And Teacher made the sentence, and diagrammed it on the board;
>>     I looked and saw that it was so.
>>8. And the Teacher called the sentence declarative.  And the capital
>>     and the period were the second day.
>>9. And Teacher said, "Let the noun words in the sentence be gathered
>>     together unto one place, and let the verb words appear; and it
>>     was so.
>>10. And Teacher called the verb words predicate; and the gathering
>>     together of noun words called she the subject; and Teacher saw
>>     that it was good.
>>11. And Teacher said, "Let the predicate bring forth modifiers, the
>>     transitive verbs yielding objects, and the intransitive verbs
>>     yielding complements after their own kind, whose place is in
>>     itself, within the predicate;" and it was so.
>>12. And the predicate brought forth modifiers, and transitive verbs
>>     yielding objects after their own kind, and intransitive verbs
>>     yielding a complement whose place was in itself, after their own
>>     kind: The Teacher saw that it was good and confusing.
>>13. And the active and the passive were the third day.
>>14. And Teacher said, "Let there be modifiers in the firmament of the
>>     subject to further confuse and divide the students in the
>>     classroom; and let them be for proper nouns, concrete nouns, mass
>>     nouns, collective nouns, pronouns, and abstract nouns."
>>15. "And let them be for to give meaning in the subject and to enhance
>>     the predicate;" and it was so---confusing.
>>16. And Teacher made two great words: the greater word -adjective-
>>     to rule the noun, and the lesser word -adverb- to rule the verb;
>>     she made the conjunction also.
>>17. And Teacher set them in the sentence in order to make it difficult
>>     to diagram.
>>18. And to make it easier for her to divide the bright students from
>>     those who remained in darkness; and Teacher saw that her system
>>     was good.
>>19. And the phrase and the clause were the fourth day.
>>20. And Teacher said, "Let the verbs bring forth abundantly the many
>>     verb forms, the gerunds, infinitives, and participles; the
>>     subjunctives; the auxiliary verbs, the linking verbs; and the
>>     phrasal verbs."
>>21. And Teacher created mood for every living creature that moveth,
>>     and tense for all time, and voice after their kind: and Teacher
>>     saw that it was indeed good.
>>22. And Teacher blessed them saying, "Be fruitful and multiply in
>>     complexity, and fill young minds with bewilderment, and let the
>>     bewilderment multiply into chaos in their minds."
>>23. And the lecture and the English test were the fifth day.
>>24. And Teacher said, "Let the nouns and verbs bring forth living
>>     sentences after their own kind, book reports, essay questions,
>>     and English themes for the students to write;" and it was very
>>     so.
>>25. And Teacher made all these things for the freshman English student
>>     to do, and everything that creepeth into her mind she gave to
>>     them to do; and Teacher saw to it that it was good.
>>26. And Teacher said, "Let us make one project in our image, after our
>>     likeness; and let the product have dominion over the other
>>     projects, and over every subject of the college student."
>>27. So Teacher created the research paper in her own image, in the
>>     image of Teacher created she it; boring and difficult created she
>>     it.
>>28. And Teacher blessed it, and Teacher said unto the research paper,
>>     "Be fruitful and multiply, and replenish the supply of dropouts,
>>     and subdue the remainder of the college students; and have
>>     dominion over the other projects, and over the other subjects,
>>     and over every single grade that the students receive."
>>29. "And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air,
>>     and to every thing that creepeth into the classroom, wherein
>>     there is life, I have given every rule and principle for good
>>     English;" and it was so.
>>30. And Teacher saw everything that she had made, and behold it was
>>     very good.
>

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October 2003, Week 3
October 2003, Week 2
October 2003, Week 1
September 2003, Week 5
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September 2003, Week 3
September 2003, Week 2
September 2003, Week 1
August 2003, Week 5
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August 2003, Week 3
August 2003, Week 2
August 2003, Week 1
July 2003, Week 5
July 2003, Week 4
July 2003, Week 3
July 2003, Week 2
July 2003, Week 1
June 2003, Week 4
June 2003, Week 3
June 2003, Week 2
June 2003, Week 1
May 2003, Week 5
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May 2003, Week 3
May 2003, Week 2
May 2003, Week 1
April 2003, Week 5
April 2003, Week 4
April 2003, Week 3
April 2003, Week 2
April 2003, Week 1
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March 2003, Week 3
March 2003, Week 2
March 2003, Week 1
February 2003, Week 4
February 2003, Week 3
February 2003, Week 2
February 2003, Week 1
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January 2003, Week 4
January 2003, Week 3
January 2003, Week 2
January 2003, Week 1
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December 2002, Week 4
December 2002, Week 3
December 2002, Week 2
December 2002, Week 1
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November 2002, Week 3
November 2002, Week 2
November 2002, Week 1
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October 2002, Week 4
October 2002, Week 3
October 2002, Week 2
October 2002, Week 1
September 2002, Week 5
September 2002, Week 4
September 2002, Week 3
September 2002, Week 2
September 2002, Week 1
August 2002, Week 5
August 2002, Week 4
August 2002, Week 3
August 2002, Week 2
August 2002, Week 1
July 2002, Week 5
July 2002, Week 4
July 2002, Week 3
July 2002, Week 2
June 2002, Week 4
June 2002, Week 3
June 2002, Week 2
June 2002, Week 1
May 2002, Week 5
May 2002, Week 4
May 2002, Week 3
May 2002, Week 2
May 2002, Week 1
April 2002, Week 5
April 2002, Week 4
April 2002, Week 3
April 2002, Week 2
April 2002, Week 1
March 2002, Week 5
March 2002, Week 4
March 2002, Week 3
March 2002, Week 2
March 2002, Week 1
February 2002, Week 4
February 2002, Week 3
February 2002, Week 2
February 2002, Week 1
January 2002, Week 5
January 2002, Week 4
January 2002, Week 3
January 2002, Week 2
January 2002, Week 1
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December 2001, Week 3
December 2001, Week 2
December 2001, Week 1
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November 2001, Week 3
November 2001, Week 2
November 2001, Week 1
October 2001, Week 5
October 2001, Week 4
October 2001, Week 3
October 2001, Week 2
October 2001, Week 1
September 2001, Week 5
September 2001, Week 4
September 2001, Week 3
September 2001, Week 2
September 2001, Week 1
August 2001, Week 5
August 2001, Week 4
August 2001, Week 3
August 2001, Week 2
August 2001, Week 1
July 2001, Week 4
July 2001, Week 3
July 2001, Week 2
July 2001, Week 1
June 2001, Week 5
June 2001, Week 4
June 2001, Week 3
June 2001, Week 2
June 2001, Week 1
May 2001, Week 5
May 2001, Week 4
May 2001, Week 3
May 2001, Week 2
May 2001, Week 1
April 2001, Week 5
April 2001, Week 4
April 2001, Week 3
April 2001, Week 2
April 2001, Week 1
March 2001, Week 5
March 2001, Week 4
March 2001, Week 3
March 2001, Week 2
March 2001, Week 1
February 2001, Week 4
February 2001, Week 3
February 2001, Week 2
February 2001, Week 1
January 2001, Week 5
January 2001, Week 4
January 2001, Week 3
January 2001, Week 2
January 2001, Week 1
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December 2000, Week 4
December 2000, Week 3
December 2000, Week 2
December 2000, Week 1
November 2000, Week 5
November 2000, Week 4
November 2000, Week 3
November 2000, Week 2
November 2000, Week 1
October 2000, Week 5
October 2000, Week 4
October 2000, Week 3
October 2000, Week 2
October 2000, Week 1
September 2000, Week 5
September 2000, Week 4
September 2000, Week 3
September 2000, Week 2
September 2000, Week 1
August 2000, Week 5
August 2000, Week 4
August 2000, Week 3
August 2000, Week 2
August 2000, Week 1
July 2000, Week 5
July 2000, Week 4
July 2000, Week 2
July 2000, Week 1
June 2000, Week 5
June 2000, Week 4
June 2000, Week 3
June 2000, Week 2
June 2000, Week 1
May 2000, Week 5
May 2000, Week 4
May 2000, Week 3
May 2000, Week 2
May 2000, Week 1
April 2000, Week 5
April 2000, Week 4
April 2000, Week 3
April 2000, Week 2
April 2000, Week 1
March 2000, Week 5
March 2000, Week 4
March 2000, Week 3
March 2000, Week 2
March 2000, Week 1
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February 2000, Week 3
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February 2000, Week 1
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January 2000, Week 1
December 1999, Week 5
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December 1999, Week 3
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November 1999, Week 1
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October 1999, Week 1
September 1999, Week 5
September 1999, Week 4
September 1999, Week 3
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September 1999, Week 1
August 1999, Week 5
August 1999, Week 4
August 1999, Week 3
August 1999, Week 2
July 1999, Week 5
July 1999, Week 4
July 1999, Week 3
June 1999, Week 4
June 1999, Week 3
June 1999, Week 2
June 1999, Week 1
May 1999, Week 5
May 1999, Week 4
May 1999, Week 3
May 1999, Week 2
April 1999, Week 5
April 1999, Week 4
April 1999, Week 3
April 1999, Week 2
April 1999, Week 1
March 1999, Week 5
March 1999, Week 4
March 1999, Week 3
March 1999, Week 2
March 1999, Week 1
February 1999, Week 4
February 1999, Week 3
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February 1999, Week 1
January 1999, Week 5
January 1999, Week 4
January 1999, Week 3
January 1999, Week 2
January 1999, Week 1
December 1998, Week 5
December 1998, Week 4
December 1998, Week 3
December 1998, Week 2
December 1998, Week 1
November 1998, Week 5
November 1998, Week 4
November 1998, Week 3
November 1998, Week 2
November 1998, Week 1
October 1998, Week 5
October 1998, Week 4
October 1998, Week 3
October 1998, Week 2
October 1998, Week 1
September 1998, Week 5
September 1998, Week 4
September 1998, Week 3
September 1998, Week 2
September 1998, Week 1
August 1998, Week 4
August 1998, Week 3
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August 1998, Week 1
July 1998, Week 4
July 1998, Week 3
July 1998, Week 2
July 1998, Week 1
June 1998, Week 5
June 1998, Week 4
June 1998, Week 3
June 1998, Week 2
June 1998, Week 1
May 1998, Week 5
May 1998, Week 4
May 1998, Week 3
May 1998, Week 2
May 1998, Week 1
April 1998, Week 5
April 1998, Week 4
April 1998, Week 3
April 1998, Week 2
April 1998, Week 1
March 1998, Week 5
March 1998, Week 4
March 1998, Week 3
March 1998, Week 2
March 1998, Week 1
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February 1998, Week 3
February 1998, Week 2
February 1998, Week 1
January 1998, Week 5
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January 1998, Week 3
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January 1998, Week 1
December 1997, Week 5
December 1997, Week 4
December 1997, Week 3
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December 1997, Week 1
November 1997, Week 4
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October 1997, Week 3
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October 1997, Week 1
September 1997, Week 5
September 1997, Week 4
September 1997, Week 3
September 1997, Week 2
September 1997, Week 1
August 1997, Week 5
August 1997, Week 4
August 1997, Week 3
August 1997, Week 2
August 1997, Week 1
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June 1997, Week 4

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